Peace, love and no hugging

In Evergreen, not far from Denver, a middle school has banned the nefarious hug. Or more specifically they have outlined what a proper hug entails. Around two seconds of love, but no more.

“In many areas of our culture, hugging is completely appropriate and welcomed,” said a letter to parents. “Unfortunately, some of our students were taking hugging a bit too far.”

A second clarification letter states that there will be no “prolonged embraces between students that may be considered sexual harassment.”

Other inappropriate behavior (highlights are mine):

Appropriate interactions - no bullying, harassment and intimidation. This behavior can be direct or indirect such as cutting in line at lunch, superior attitudes and put-downs.

Appropriate conversations - no name calling, slang terms or cursing.

Appropriate dress - outlined in the student handbook, which states clothing should not distract from the educational environment.

Appropriate touching - no grabbing, inappropriate or prolonged hugging, slapping, back rubbing, pushing or inappropriate public displays of affection.

No slang terms for teenagers? I’m not sure they’ll have much to say. And isn’t a superior attitude a rather subjective area?

Then again, I suppose we can be happy that excessive hugging, slang and haughtiness are the biggest problems this school faces.